Lab Grown Meat: PETA’s Contest is Lame, Pointless

PETA is at it again, and if you didn’t groan at least internally when you heard that, perhaps they’ve pushed you past your give-a-shit limit. They put out a press release announcing that they’d give a $1 million reward to the first person who can successfully ‘grow’ chicken in a lab without harming animals. From PETA.org:

In vitro meat production would use animal stem cells that would be placed in a medium to grow and reproduce. The result would mimic flesh and could be cooked and eaten. Some promising steps have been made toward this technology, but we’re still several years away from having in vitro meat be available to the general public.

At first when I heard this, I thought it was just another one of PETA’s publicity stunts: putting out something shocking to draw attention to an issue. As a vegetarian since the age of 12 and someone who cares deeply about animal rights, I’ve never been a fan of PETA and this sort of thing is exactly why. PETA frustrates me because they have a noble goal but they’re turning the entire animal rights issue into a freak show replete with naked celebrities, buckets of blood and gross-out tactics that turn off the general public rather than achieving anything real.

Unfortunately, they’re serious. They really want someone to make this work. So, why is this lab-grown chicken contest a bad thing? You may wonder why a vegetarian would be anything less than thrilled about the idea of fewer animals being harmed on a daily basis (and, after all, livestock farms are certainly not good for the planet).

Basically, this contest isn’t going to accomplish anything. First of all, $1 million wouldn’t even cover the expenses required to pull this off. Not only would researchers have to spend literally years working on this project, the contest requires them to do near-impossible sales and marketing tasks beyond the scope of science. Daniel Engber of Slate describes it well:

…they need to move 2,000 pounds of the stuff at supermarkets and chain restaurants spread out across 10 states during a period of three months. And the Franken-meat can’t cost more than regular chicken…

To make matters worse, PETA’s commercial requirements saddle researchers with demands that have nothing to do with science. Any company that wants to sell artificial chicken for public consumption will probably face a lengthy government-review process.

In short, PETA is asking for the impossible. Any researcher who puts a serious amount of thought into this contest will most likely realize that they simply don’t have the time or funds to accomplish the lab-meat feat.

This ‘lab grown meat’ stunt is just another example of PETA making vegetarians look bad, in my opinion. I can’t imagine that ‘Franken-meat’ would be all that appetizing to meat-eaters anyway, but you tell me: would you eat it?

Link [PETA] + [Slate]

Photo credit: Wikimedia Commons & Flickr user karindalziel