Get Ready To Die: 7 Reasons You Should Be Losing Sleep Tonight

Global warming, nuclear war, global pandemics, drug-resistant microbes, asteroids hitting earth and a water crisis of epic proportions – these may all be worst-case scenarios, and scary ones at that, but they’re entirely possible and they’d probably kill a huge chunk of the human race. Think our elected officials won’t let these things happen? One of the most important things the people of America should have learned in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina is that we can’t count on the government to protect us, no matter how bad things get. If any of these things happen, we’re screwed.

If you’re reading this within a few hours of going to bed, maybe you’d better leave it for the morning. It’s no lullaby.

7- Global warming is real, and we’re screwed.

Image via 20th Century Fox

Some people would have you believe that there’s nothing to worry about – global warming isn’t real, isn’t happening as fast as scientists say or isn’t caused by our actions. For the average person, the reality of global warming hasn’t set in; the furthest they’ve gone in response to the idea is to start using CFL light bulbs. We’ve got some tough news, guys: covering your eyes and ears isn’t going to stop it from happening.

Flicks like The Day After Tomorrow may be totally cheesy and based on pseudo-science, but they do provide some idea of how serious a total collapse of our environment could be. Some global warming deniers trumpet the idea that the climate has gone through radical changes before man-made influence made it worse, but don’t let that lull you into complacency. Man-made or not, if the average temperatures rise or fall by even a little, we could be toast.

To make things even worse, the frightening reality is we most likely aren’t going to do anything serious to address the problems before it’s too late. Politics in the US and across the world don’t often allow for making big sacrifices. Global warming is going to kill thousands of species and make our planet a very different place -–one that, perhaps, will not sustain human life.

Lose more sleep because of global warming by reading State of the Science: Beyond the Worst Case Climate Change Scenario

6- Terrorists will get and use nuclear weapons.

Image via Wikimedia Commons

We live in a world where regular people routinely blow themselves up in order to take out a crowd and make a statement. Even if you aren’t worried about countries like Iran and North Korea, who we certainly can’t count on keeping their fingers off the button, it’s still entirely possible that nuclear technology could fall into the wrong hands and blow us all to hell as a result.

Imagine an innocent-looking cargo container pulling into, say, New York Harbor… or San Diego, or Baltimore, or one of the dozens of other port cities in America. Those containers don’t get inspected nearly as often as we’d like to think. Regardless of who does it, how or why, it’s coming. So grab your loved one and get that last kiss, because you never know which day will be your last.

Lose more sleep because of nuclear weapons by reading ‘Security Flaws, Terrorists & Nuclear Weapons’

5- A global pandemic sweeps across the world.

Image via MN National Guard

So, bird flu and SARS didn’t end up decimating a large percentage of the population across the world as feared. That doesn’t mean we won’t get hit by some kind Stand-like global pandemic at one point or another. It’s only a matter of time. Globalization and lifestyle changes have made the world a small place, and viruses travel a lot faster than they used to. The British House of Lords intergovernmental organizations committee estimates that the next pandemic will kill between 2 million and 50 million people.

The news reports would start trickling in: thousands of people are dying. It’s spreading fast. There’s no vaccine and no cure. Cases would start popping up in every country around the world – no one would be safe, but children, the elderly and the infirm would be the most susceptible. You can wear a mask if it makes you feel better, but you’d better go ahead and write up that will you’ve been putting off.

Lose more sleep because of a global pandemic by reading ‘Global flu pandemic “inevitable,” says top infectious disease scientist’

4- Antibiotic resistance means get a little cut, and you die.

Image via Flickr user Cape May

In the last decade or so, antibacterial products have become all the rage, and doctors have been over-prescribing antibiotics at alarming rates. Oh, you got a cough? Here’s some erythromycin. Too bad all of this stuff has caused microbes to become resistant to drugs that used to be very effective, and they’re getting stronger. So called ‘super bugs’ could evolve to the point where we can no longer treat infections at all.

That means staph, streptococcus, tuberculosis, malaria and other diseases would cause increasing rates of death, and longer periods of infection – hello, pandemic (guess that gets two hits on this list). It also means infections that were never previously considered serious could become gaping, festering wounds resistant to all forms of treatment. Never thought you could die from a cut, did you? So get rid of all of your antibacterial products, but it won’t necessarily save you. We’re all in on this one.

Lose more sleep because of antibiotic resistance by reading The World Health Organization Report on Antimicrobial Resistance

3- A big asteroid will hit the Earth and wipe us out.

Image via NewScientist.com

It might sound a bit far-fetched, but this is not just the premise of dozens of cheesy action movies. There is new and very compelling evidence that asteroid and comet impacts on the surface of the earth are more common than once thought. And instead of using our resources to guard against it – with telescopes and rockets and, y’know, technology – NASA is spending billions on things like sending a manned mission to Mars.

What kind of damage would an asteroid do? Well, 100 years ago a very small meteor or comet – about 40 meters across – hit Siberia. It apparently blew right under the radar of scientists, who don’t track meteorites under a certain size. So what did it do? It leveled more than 800 square miles! It exploded before it hit the ground and it had roughly 10-15 megatons of blast. This is about 1000 times as powerful as the bomb dropped on Hiroshima. If it had hit Moscow instead of a forest, millions would have died.

So, imagine what would transpire if one just a little big larger hit a population center. Or, consider the effects of one hitting the ocean, which is more likely on our mostly ocean-comprised planet. The tsunami that it would create would do even more damage. Though the chances of an asteroid impact are low, they’re very real all the same. Feeling vulnerable yet? Time to start on that ‘bucket list’.

Lose more sleep about asteroids hitting us by reading ‘Impact Earth: Could we divert a giant asteroid?’

2- A global water crisis makes fresh water more valuable than gold.

Image via Sidney Morning Herald/Reuters

You might think we’ll never run out of water; after all, our planet is mostly ocean. But that doesn’t mean we have an endless supply of potable fresh water, and desalinating seawater is a difficult and energy-intensive process. Rampant economic and population growth is already putting a strain on our water resources, and climate change could cause it to dry up even more. That’s leading many to fear the privatization of water, where our water supply would be in private hands and sell for as much as demand allows.

Water shortages would beget food shortages, and wars would crop up across the world. Water is the oil of the not-so-distant future, and much blood will be shed over it. We’ve ignored the problem for too long, and we’re ill-equipped to deal with it. Obviously, we need water to live, so things aren’t lookin’ so good for people right about now.

Lose more sleep because of the global water crisis by reading ‘US and Global Water Wars Loom’

1- ManBearPig will go on a bloody rampage and kill us all.

Image via South Park Studios

Al Gore has already warned us about ManBearPig, but not everyone is listening. He’s even called us in the middle of the night to warn us, but we insist on ignoring him and it will be our downfall. We’re just continuing to go about our business, taking walks through the woods and even camping knowing that ManBearPig is out there and ready to rip our throats out without a moment’s notice.

Once ManBearPig begins its rampage, it will be too late. It’ll get a taste for blood and all of us will be doomed. MBP is not just a desperate plea for attention on the part of Al Gore. It’s real, and it’s coming to get us. You might as well make peace with death now. We’re totally cereal.

Lose more sleep because of ManBearPig by reading Scientists successfully create human-bear-pig chimera (manbearpig)

If these scary scenarios have you all wound up, check back with us later in the week for ‘7 Reasons You Should Sleep Like a Baby Tonight’, detailing all of the good things we’re accomplishing in the war against ourselves.

Related Posts:

Global Warming Will Cause Malaria Epidemic in Australia and Pacific Islands
Climate Change Helps Spread Deadly Diseases
Watch Al Gore’s Awesomely Updated Slideshow from TED: The Urgency of Manbearpig
Al Gore Urges Civil Disobedience to Fight Coal Plants
Bad Idea: Hotlinking Image From Your Blog. Even Worse Idea: Hotlinking to Earthfirst.com From Your Blog