FYI: Wildlife Refuges are the Place to Go for Illicit Hookups

So, the men’s restrooms at your local park are now infested with undercover cops who stick out like a sore thumb, given that they don’t have a leash connecting their junk to a collar around their neck. What do you do? The rest stops aren’t safe anymore. Airport bathrooms are now too conspicuous, thanks to that sellout Senator Craig. Fear not, trollers: you can now have anonymous unprotected sex at wildlife refuges without fear of getting caught. You might have to drill some new glory holes, but it will be totally worth it.

From MSNBC:

America’s wildlife refuges are so short of money that one-third have no staff, boardwalks and buildings are in disrepair, and drug dealers are using them to grow marijuana and make methamphetamine, a group pushing for more funding says.

A decrease in law enforcement has left the refuges vulnerable to criminal activity, including prostitution, torched cars and illegal immigrant camps along the Potomac River in suburban Washington, D.C.; gay sex hookups in South Carolina and Alabama; methamphetamine labs in Nevada; and pot growing operations in Washington state.

This is just what you’ve been hoping for. Not only are wildlife refuges free of cops and large enough to have huge meth-fueled gay sex parties, you can enjoy the scenery as you partake in the debauchery. Aww, look, it’s a cute little chipmunk!

Link [MSNBC]
Photo credit: Flickr user Ed_45

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