Bash Back at Bulk Mail: Send a Brick Back to Bulk Mailers on Their Dime- Legally!
March 26, 2008 · Print This Article
Junk mail is a pain in the ass. You get all excited to check your mail, hoping for a fatty paycheck or a steamy note from Gladys in HR or at least your FerretFancy magazine, but instead you get shat on with bills for your most recent bladder operation and a ton of crap catalogues and credit card offers.
Besides being downright disappointing, crap mailings also use up around 100 million trees, around 30 billion gallons of water, and wastes about 300 million dollars in local tax money per year. Makes you just wanna leave a flaming shit on those bulk-mail guys’ doorsteps, am I right?
Well, check out this brilliant trick from the Office of Strategic Influence. Apparently, you can use those handy business-return envelopes to mail your steamy dump free of charge. The best part is that the poor bastards actually have to pay 20 cents per pound to receive your stool sample.
Okay, so it’s technically not legal to send poop, but you can definitely get away with sending something awkward and cumbersome like a brick. And there isn’t anyway they can track you down. Bwahahahaha! So fight the good fight, send a brick to bulk!
Link [Office of Strategic Influence]
Related Posts:
10 Creative Responses to Junk Mail – From Art to Garden MulchBBC Puts Reality TV Show Stars Out With the Trash- Literally
It’s a Long Way Back to The Office- A Pull Back in Work At Home Policies?
Buy One House, Get One Free
Crying Out For Greener Office Pranks: What Does 187,000 Post It Notes Look Like
I’ve seen some pretty mean warnings on those envelopes, claiming it is “unlawful” to misuse the envelope…
how sure are we on the legality part? Granted, they can’t be traced back to you, though.
I usually just send the offers off to other companies. Chase gets a creatively filled out application for an Amex card, and vice versa etc.